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Joined 4 months ago
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Cake day: November 2nd, 2024

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  • Years ago, I’d laugh at this.

    Yet it slowly becomes reality with every passing year. It’s bad enough that we’ve essentially lost pay-to-own in favour of subscription models for a lot of popular software.

    On our corp network, the amount of GPOs I’ve had to mangle together just to make Win11 usable is insane. The users are still going to have a fit in October.





  • You joke, but GPT comes up with some bangers for UK politicians…

    .

    UK Politicians Trading Card Game

    A satirical take on British politics, styled like a mix between trading cards and Cards Against Humanity.


    John Prescott – Trading Card

    Card Title: “Two Jags, One Punch”
    Type: Labour Tank

    • Power: 9/10
    • Charisma: 5/10
    • Policy Success: 6/10
    • Scandal Factor: 7/10
    • Verbal Clarity: 2/10

    .
    Special Ability: “The Left Hook of Justice”

    Once per game, if an opponent plays a hostile media card, Prescott may respond with a Swift Uppercut, instantly negating the attack and leaving journalists dazed.

    Quote:

    “The Green Belt is a Labour initiative and we intend to build on it.”

    Flavour Text:
    A heavyweight in both politics and physical altercations, Prescott served as Tony Blair’s deputy and made headlines for his blunt approach to diplomacy—particularly when it involved egg-wielding protesters. He was famous for his commitment to public transport… while owning two Jaguars. :::


    Tony Blair – Trading Card

    Card Title: “Cool Britannia’s War Criminal”
    Type: Labour Messiah (Corrupted Form)

    • Power: 8/10
    • Charisma: 10/10
    • Policy Success: 9/10
    • Scandal Factor: 9/10
    • Trustworthiness: -3/10

    .
    Special Ability: “Weapons of Mass Distraction”

    If an opponent plays a Bad Press or Public Inquiry card, Blair may redirect all attention onto a vague existential threat, completely avoiding consequences for one turn.

    Quote:

    "Look, what we have to understand is… (proceeds to dodge the question for 15 minutes)"

    Flavour Text:
    Once hailed as the saviour of the Labour Party, Blair modernised Britain with a grin, a soundbite, and a suspiciously close friendship with George W. Bush. His legacy is a cocktail of public service reforms, spin-doctoring, and a certain little invasion that we swear was justified at the time.


    David Cameron – Trading Card

    Card Title: “The Pig Whisperer”
    Type: Tory Toff

    • Power: 6/10
    • Charisma: 7/10
    • Policy Success: 5/10
    • Scandal Factor: 8/10
    • Competence: 4/10

    .
    Special Ability: “Referendumb”

    If Cameron is forced into a difficult decision, he may trigger a National Vote, shifting responsibility onto the public. However, if the outcome is catastrophic, Cameron immediately Resigns to a Nice Cottage in the Cotswolds.

    Quote:

    “We’re all in this together—well, apart from my friends in the City.”

    Flavour Text:
    The man who gave the UK its most chaotic decade since World War II, Cameron’s legacy is austerity, that referendum, and that alleged incident with a pig. Thought he could handle populism—turns out he couldn’t even handle Boris Johnson.