Emotional_Series7814

Injury is a lot easier to risk if you won’t be charged more than your entire net worth for treatment. If you haven’t experienced the misery of medical debt, and know how others live with it, it’s absolutely terrifying to think about having to live with, all because you tried to do something good.

I like to try to help others but I am selfish enough to admit I’d never run myself into debt or risk my life for someone else. I always respect those willing to do what I’m not.

I buy groceries without checking a review, try local activities without checking reviews, etc.—I’m not exactly paralyzed. But something that costs a decent chunk of money I am absolutely checking a review and I don’t think that is wrong to do. The trouble with checking reviews nowadays is how easy they are to fake, how easy it is to get a genuine negative review deleted on certain sites, how a person who has it out for a small business owner can flood them with untrue negative reviews, how often they are gamed in some way such that it does not reflect the true quality of the thing…

Conversations with strangers… I’ll be honest that’s a hard one because I’m not good at social cues and I don’t want to think I’m having a nice conversation when the other half is composing a OH MY GOD STUPID FUCKING EXTROVERTS THE WORLD HATES INTROVERTS CAN’T THEY TELL I DON’T WANT TO TALK story in their head about me (being extroverted and having autism where you suck at social cues and know you suck at social cues is not a fun combination). I learned this behavior after seeing people express annoyance about strangers talking to them. Some things are obvious, like if you’re occupied with a book, but nowadays who isn’t occupied on their phone? I have had plenty of situations where I was on my phone but would have loved if someone started conversation with me—but I might be an anomaly so I just keep following the social rule of “occupied = don’t talk”. If I’m in a space where I think someone is open to socialization I am much more likely to initiate conversation—like a party or something. I’m not afraid of “sorry, not interested,” but I am afraid of “yeah I’m cool with you” (actually no I’m not but I’ll never tell you I have a problem with you until I blow up about it 6 months later).

I like quick and easy access to 911 or a locksmith’s number in case I leave the house and lock myself out and cannot find the spare key but there are other reasons I leave the house with a phone than risk aversion/insurance for screwups I have committed before—for directions, or because it’s nice to have a thing that staves away boredom if I know I’ll probably be sitting in a line for 30 minutes, or because I have a digital wallet on there that is easier to carry around than my real wallet…

The issue with those metrics is how many other things can motivate those behaviors besides being scared of everything, or factors that make what might be an unreasonable fear for most people actually reasonable for you (for example, a phobia of bees suddenly becomes a lot more reasonable if you are deathly allergic, live near them, and aren’t good at recognizing their hives/are accident-prone), but I do get the core of what you are saying. A generation who is more anxious about basic everyday things, which is definitely not good.

Although with checking reviews specifically, I’d argue that given how many times companies lower quality, change stuff, pull the rug out from under you in the name of profit, people have more and more cause to try to verify they are getting something decent when they would not have done so in the past. The more you hear of people getting screwed over, naturally the more you’ll check to make sure you are not getting screwed too. This increased risk aversion is entirely rational in my opinion.

I just want people to be happy and to not get exploited. As far as I know, people have been exploited under both capitalism and communism. I am not sure if it’s inherent to either economic structure, if there are safe guardrails you can put on either to make them not harmful, if it’s not inherent to the economic structure and what matters is also what other government type is happening alongside that economic structure, etc. Something that really doesn’t help is that often, if you grow up with one structure, you’re also taught the other one is a virus of evil that no good human being would ever support. Well, maybe a misguided one, but nobody good and smart who thinks for themselves.

It would be nice to see a civil discussion with people actually trying to figure out which one is best and least harmful, because as an outsider looking in all I see is

“capitalism is the problem”

“no it’s not, also you’re not a free thinker”

Is everyone coming in here with some prior knowledge I don’t have? Is there somewhere where people have tried to have this civil discussion that I could look at where it stayed civil?

I do think one thing I can certainly say is that there are people who lived under communism who worked hard and tried their best and still suffered in poverty under it and wanted out. And there are people who lived under capitalism who worked hard and tried their best and still suffered in poverty under it and wanted out.

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I’ll be honest, I really do not like how we’re getting hammered for our risk-aversion.

“Don’t do [risky behavior with bad consequences], otherwise [bad thing will happen]! And don’t give into peer pressure telling you you have to do [bad thing]!” is what I was taught in school and by my parents.

I listened instead of rebelling. This made sense to me, and besides a lot of the risky behaviors held no appeal for me anyways.

OMGWTFBBQ THE YOUNG GENERATION IS RISK-AVERSE :((((

I’ll keep living this way, thanks.

If they are talking about more calculated risks that we kind of need people to take, like people starting small businesses, I feel like people will always be taking that kind of risk. If they are talking about just “basic safety” risks like people not wearing seatbelts in cars, driving drunk, it’s good that that kind of risk is becoming unpopular. Whatever part of society is dependent on us taking that kind of risk can adapt or die. And if they are sad about lifestyle type risky behavior, neither good nor bad, stuff like bungee-jumping off cliffs, I have no words for older generations believing living a quiet, straight-edge life is a problem and wanting us to change that.

I can’t help you with the political side because as long as the place is LGBTQ±friendly and anti-bigotry I tend not to care, and I try to avoid overtly political spaces online for my own peace of mind. But as an LGBTQ+ agnostic who was raised with a religious background, I can tell you some places I found on Reddit. I know it’s kind of sacrilege to direct people there, especially on the Fediverse where a lot of us left Reddit for here, but I figure looking for people who will accept you instead of tossing vitriol your way takes priority here, just like I would not begrudge anyone who relies on r/stopdrinking for staying.

No idea what your religion is, this reflects my own background, so sorry in advance if it is not useful, but at least you’ll know you are not alone.

r/QueerTheology, r/OpenChristian and a ton of the Related Subreddits on their sidebar. I remember r/OpenCatholic, r/GayChristians. If you click around on the sidebars of these I think they can also help you find related places for other religions and being LGBTQ+. I swear there was a subreddit for leftist Christians but I don’t remember the name anymore. It might have died in the API drama or not.

Although as far as I know you might want to know that this is a place for promoting a new community, not searching for one. Not actually sure where you are supposed to go to search for one, though…

Sorry! One thing Kbin doesn’t do and that Lemmy seems to do sometimes is telling me, without me clicking on the user’s profile, which platform and instance a poster is posting from.

As a Kbin user, microblogs definitely are not all the posts we make here. We can both microblog through “Add new post” and make a thread through “Add new link”, “Add new thread”, and “Add new photo”.

Genuine question, as a non-Twitter user, what was Twitter-style discussion that held value like? I only ever heard about it being a quick source for certain official outlets to broadcast to others (which does have value but that’s not discussion), a place for political fighting and harassment, and about how you weren’t able to have nuanced discussions within the small character limit.

I know one advantage of Mastodon is that the character limit is much higher.

I was always annoyed by the “LMAO everyone pathetic nerd stereotype” thing they did on Reddit, only partially because it assumed everyone was a man desperate for sex from a woman. Is this comment an attempt at a joke or a genuine assessment?

I may be a nerd and it is probably fair to say most Fediverse users are. But I’m not a basement-dweller stereotype and I’m not sure where that comes from aside from the tired old Reddit joke about all its users being that exact stereotype.

Also, again, network effects. Go where advice exists on a nice wiki, not where it’s a new community and maybe 1 person will answer your comment if you are lucky—a lot of people just want an answer and don’t want to deal with the nonresponse and tumbleweeds from a totally new community. It is emotionally easier to toss a post about gaming into the void than it is to approach with an actual problem you have in a relationship or with your finances you need help with, then to check in daily in hope someone answered only to get crickets back, and then repost in another community (or even another site, where you might have to rewrite that post so that you can’t just look it up and find out FediverseUser83 posted the same thing as RedditUser92 and is thus probably the same person’s two accounts). So these become “why waste the effort and time when you could just go to Reddit and get a quicker response?” to an even higher level than other communities—nonresponse probably hurts more.

For relationship advice specifically, I recall that subreddit being called unrealistic so often that I understand why people might be wary to start a new one here.

I’m actually pretty image-conscious and a lot of this manifests in putting effort into how I dress. I am also incredibly uncomfortable putting pictures of myself (yes, you can talk about fashion without selfies, but the typical “does this look good on me” post requires you post yourself. “Look at this outfit I put together” is easiest to do with your own human body, not searching online for images of each piece of clothing you put on and putting them in one image, especially because some older pieces may not have a perfectly matching online image) on social media like Reddit, let alone the Fediverse which duplicates your post to tons of servers who may or may not respect post deletions. I’d imagine this frustrates the growth of fashion, makeup, and hair communities.

I wasn’t aware of “beaver” as a sexual slang term until I watched a Lockpicking Lawyer video and now I’m certainly going to remember it thanks to this post having to specify that the beavers should be SFW.

I’ve personally never heard a rendition of Jingle Bells with a horse whinny and whip crack. Which one is this?

The way it worked on Reddit was that people would post a link to a small audio clip of them singing the song (usually on vocaroo.com) or playing what they remembered of it on an instrument. You could also talk about what happened in the music video, what kind of voices were singing, etc.

If I tell you I can’t remember the name of a tune commonly played at Christmas that has a couple recordings with singing and some just as an instrumental, and on the instrumental there’s a horse whinny and whip crack? You probably know I’m talking about Sleigh Ride.

all the news content posted by the mods will be entirely readable on Lemmy.

I don’t even like Forza but came here anyways to say props to you for that, seems like it’ll be a great community for Forza fans