This is how you keep a man on the toilet shitting blood after he gets Salmonella

MOAR

It’s too late dude I opened this at work and now I have cum all over my pants way to go!

LOOK AT DEM SAUSAGE FINGERS

When you nut but the milking machine keeps milking

Prime’s entire UI already sucks dick. I can’t even tell which shows/movies I can watch without having to pay, rent, or subscribe. Like mfer I’m paying to watch whatever Amazon has to offer. I only use it for The Boys, Reacher, and Invincible. Even with how much I would love to support these shows, fuck Amazon.

• 🏴‍☠️

Now we’re talking 🤤

BONK

Ugh the nostalgia, takes me back

“Why are there red lights on this one?”

3 each for a Hoe Hoe Hoe

IS THE 2024 ELECTION GOING TO CAUSE SOCIETY TO COLLAPSE??

no, probably not

If that’s the case, those jets might be getting destroyed

I love you weather channel, never change weather channel

Crowbcat FTW

There’s a small chance something devastating won’t happen before big changes happen to try and reverse climate change but odds are a lot of shit is gonna happen that’s gonna lead to a lot of people dying. Not end of the world shit, but a lot of people are gonna suffer because of greed and lack of improving the world

So does all of the nut in my bedside trashcan gonna be waiting for me in heaven with half chromosome bodies or some shit?

“yeah baby you like my baby smooth dick?”

Hehe…yeah…finger… definitely my finger…

Joke but okay. Also way to assume a person’s identity