Jon fucked the succubus

“Scotty we’re making it to Lemmy with this one!”

My first thought too, I forgot about the kink

It’s actually just for support, they’re pretty heavy

It’s easier than explaining sometimes

If I ever decide to have kids then I’m adopting because I can’t in good conscience bring a life into this shitty world

It’s a bit extreme, I just need one straight through my temples

It’s smart until I instinctually scroll to the U section only to not find United States

I bet not, you only think about yourself

“I don’t get paid enough for this”

Whats wrong babe? You’ve barely touched your circumcised banana

My Fellow Americans

“John”

Burger King? Yum? I don’t think so

Yea that one too

Thanks, I feel old now

You don’t ask people for help because you’re afraid of looking weak

I dont ask for help because I don’t want to bother them

We are not the same

Goes from composed good boy to OMYGOSHWATERFROMAHOSE??

How do you know who that is? Is this even heaven? Where are my goddamn labels that tell me what to think???

I’m ordering one for my funeral so I can rain down on the guests