Hi guys, I know this is kind of an odd request, but I need your help.

I just got invited to a Halloween Party by good friends and I’m really not big on the costume stuff. I usually just wear a piece of paper around my neck with some sort of “joke” on it.

So there will be a lot of programmers and computer scientists at this party and that’s where I need you guys help. I need ideas for cheesy Programmer Humor kind of oneliner jokes I can easily fit on a normal piece of paper.

I’m kinda looking for stuff recognisable by most, but too niche for me to come up with it myself.

I have none to superficial understanding of programming languages, but I really don’t need an explanation of the joke. If sb asks, I’ll just come up with something.

I hope you guys can help me out with that.

  • zcd@lemmy.ca
    43·
    1 year ago

    Your paper: “Ask me about watercooling”

    Your accessory: water spray bottle

    When anyone asks you about watercooling give them a little spritz

  • Hot Saucerman@lemmy.mlEnglish
    311·
    1 year ago

    You could always just go as “End User” which is just a name tag and introduce yourself by quoting Taylor Swift (like the average end user):

    “It’s me. Hi, I’m the problem, it’s me.”

    Sly reference to PEBCAK.

    • SzethFriendOfNimi@lemmy.world
      22·
      1 year ago

      If you want to put a little effort into it.

      1. Put on a T-shirt backwards with the name tag on the back saying “end user”

      2. Wear sunglasses you drop down when somebody notes it and ask “hey… why’d you turn off my pc?”

      3. Have a wallet with a bunch of printed out “ad” cards (blurred and heavily pixelated NSFW, 1000th customer, free phone, antivirus warning, etc. so you can show them all the important things you’ve been offered and “saved”

      Bonus points for tapping them and commenting that it’s their fault for your stuff not working.

      1. Different colored laces and when somebody notes it insist that they’re the same and you definitely didn’t replace the company issued hardware with a cheap knockoff you bought from previously mentioned “adware”
      • saplyng@kbin.social
        6·
        1 year ago

        I just got off work and you’re here bringing me back writing ptsd for that party of programmers

  • alignedchaos@sh.itjust.works
    21·
    1 year ago

    Nametag that says “GitHub CoPilot” and if anyone asks you to “help them with their code” answer like you’re Clippy from MS Word

    • Hot Saucerman@lemmy.mlEnglish
      9·
      1 year ago

      Alternately, pipe output to “Notepad” and speak by writing your thoughts on a notepad all night.

  • Ethanol@pawb.socialEnglish
    10·
    1 year ago

    What do you call a group of 8 Hobbits?
    A Hobbyte!

    old pun by now but I still love it :P

  • runner_g@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    9·
    1 year ago

    “ITs secret weapon:” Picture of power button

    Or

    While True{
    give_booze("*");
}

    *Include your favorite drink here

  • 📛Maven@lemmy.sdf.orgEnglish
    8·
    1 year ago

    Wear a facemask with 255.255.255.0 and/or /24 sharpied on it and if anyone asks, tell them you’re complying with mask mandates

  • bassdruminphonebox@beehaw.org
    6·
    1 year ago

    How about two pieces of paper (based on a t shirt I saw once)… paper on your front, with < BODY >, and second piece of paper with < /BODY > on your back. Made me laugh when I saw it :)

    Edit: the tags keep being deleted… perhaps it is readable now…

  • hakunawazo@lemmy.world
    6·
    1 year ago

    In case of twitter (x) boss appearing: Emergency printout of last 30 days code:

    print(“Hello world!”);

    /* I’m so fired… */

  • Lettuce eat lettuce@lemmy.ml
    71·
    1 year ago

    if CanReadThis = true { TooClose = true }

    Feel free to make it look like proper code lol, I don’t know how to program :P

    • mifan@feddit.dk
      7·
      1 year ago

      Most programming languages uses = to copy a value into whatever whatever you put on the left side. You did it with TooClose, which you set to true.

      But when you compare values as you do with the if statement, you need another operator, otherwise CanReadThis will be set to true and the if statement will always run (or syntax error), making it unnecessary.

      Compare operators are typically == and/or === and some languages uses their own like ‘eq’ or other exciting ways.

      Languages and compilers works in different ways, but your program could look like this. (When comparing a Boolean you don’t need the operator, you can just write the variable since it’s either true or false)

      If (CanReadThis) { TooClose = true; }

    • slampisko@czech-lemmy.eu
      5·
      1 year ago

      Decided to write it in python for brevity.

      if you.can_read_this():
    you.is_too_close = True

      though if you know what you’re doing, you’d be more likely to do something like

      you.is_too_close = you.can_read_this()