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Debian is a full day of romantic walks on the beach, fine dining, dancing, and taking in a romantic comedy, followed by easy quick familiar sex and then falling asleep in front of an episode of cozy reality television.

(It can become anything I imagine, but the defaults are just so comfortable…)

Kubuntu is like wearing a condom because you have to

(it’s the only thing that consistently boots on my weird Samsung laptop. everything else intermittently boot loops…)

Anal (Ubuntu)

Because at this point, if you’re still on it you’re taking it up the ass from Canonical