Currently I am a uni student, working 4 days a week during the summer, moving to about 3 during term time.
Every day I’m not working I feel tired constantly, regardless of amount of sleep. I push through anyways to get the work that needs done finished, then sit down and just collapse basically. I wouldn’t even call it relax, just sit and switch off.
I don’t have any energy or motivation to play games anymore, even though I used to play avidly. I play guitar but it’s been feeling like I’m not getting as much out of it now…
Once I’m out of uni, I’ll be in full-time and, if I get into the industry I want, more mentally taxing work.
In short, is there something I’m missing here, or is work-eat-sleep-repeat all there is until I retire? Cause frankly I’m more sure I can be arsed if not…
EDIT
Thanks for the responses, I kinda posted this in a moment of hopelessness for life and I don’t really know what I wanted as a response.
Asking for the meaning of life? Lemmy’s great and all, but I don’t think I’ll find it here lmao
Regardless, there’s a few things here for me to look into and take further, so thank you again!
If this is to close for comfort for rule 3, feel free to delete mods
Life is what you make of it. There’s no meaning, no purpose. You have to make your own. That takes effort, but it can be rewarding.
There’s no meaning, no purpose. You have to make your own. That takes effort, but it can be rewarding.
It’s like an open sandbox RPG. But you’re forced to play it.
And the devs are lazy and don’t add new content
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I’ve always said the meaning of life is a blank page. You get to fill out out. But that’s both freeing and terrifying at the same time.
Except it’s not really you /get/ to fill it out. It’s more like you have to start filling it or you will die. If you ever let your pen stall for too long, you will become homeless, and you will starve. I’m just so tired and my page is still so blank.
That depends on your perspective. You are describing the terrifying aspects of filling out a blank page that represents your life. Not the time for writer’s block to be sure!
There’s no meaning to life. It’s a scam of an idea that we all fall prey to. Instead, think of it as just creating new meaning to it every single day depending on what you think and do. It’s a liberating feeling, to be honest. Because now you don’t have to stress yourself out to figure out some grand meaning [that doesn’t exist] and inevitably failing and being depressed over that.
Absolutely correct. There is no inherent meaning to life. You get to decide what the meaning of your life is. For me, this is the purpose of my life:
- Be happy, and make other people happy too.
This is the objective. Then I try to figure out what steps will best accomplish that goal. Sometimes choosing to do something unpleasant now will lead to overall more happiness in your life, like going to the dentist so you don’t lose a tooth. But don’t just do a constant stream of unpleasant things just because society or family pressure you to do them. Do what you want to do with your own life.
I disagree a bit.
There is a meaning to life, but too many people are taught that the meaning of life will be foisted upon them by the invisible hand of fate and fail to realize that the meaning of life is kind of like the meaning of lego. You are given all of the pieces, what you make out of it is what is valuable.
So I agree with you that you do have to make something out of life to have a meaningful life but I disagree that it’s a void and nebulous thing that you somehow have to wrest a shape from the nothingness for it to matter, that it has no inherent meaning.
The meaning of life is that we have the opportunity to create something out of the pieces we are given, not that we have to make a meaning out of something that is meaningless.
It sounds like you’re experiencing anhedonia, which is strongly associated with depression. Ultimately life is cyclical, day to day, week to week, etc, but there should be frequent periods of happiness sprinkled in there, where you spend time doing things you like with people you like. If you can’t find anything like that, maybe talk to a therapist.
“Should be”.
And if not, work harder and have less frequently so you can pay for expensive therapy.
I am 26 and have been in the workforce for a few years.
In short, is there something I’m missing here, or is work-eat-sleep-repeat all there is until I retire?
Yes, except for the fact that you and I will not be able to retire.
I’m almost twice your age and found out the holy 401k that I’ve been putting money into magically has hardly anything in it. So yeah, I’m not getting the retirement that was promised either.
But luckily I got brought down with a huge illness, so I get to “retire” on medical disability. I’m thankful for that.
That must have been devastating. I’m sorry to hear that.
Thanks, I appreciate it.
It could have been way worse. So it’s ok. Instead of going to work I go to doctors offices every few days. The rest of the time I do whatever I want. I’m actually enjoying life right now :)
In short, is there something I’m missing here, or is work-eat-sleep-repeat all there is until I retire?
You might die before then. I definitely saw “bottlenecks” in my mid-20s and late-40s where friends dropped like flies and some never got back up again.
Anyway, it sounds like you are having a crisis - people talk about the mid-life crisis but they can happen at any age but often a turning point:
- Late teens - wait! I have to grow up and get serious?
- End of Uni - wait! I have to get a job and all that other adult nonsense?
- 30 - wait! I should really be married and having kids by now.
- 40 - wait! My biological clock is ticking, I haven’t been promoted like I thought I would and my body is starting to creak.
- 50 - well that didn’t turn out how I wanted but there’s still time.
- 60 - where did my life go? Ah well, retirement is looming, I can’t wait for all that free time.
- 70 - death is looming, where did all that free time go?
Unfortunately, the meaning of life is what you make of it, so start managing your expectations.and don’t measure your happiness against other people’s - they’re probably less happy than they appear.
I can’t claim to have any clear answers but find.out what you love doing and build your life around doing more of that. Don’t let your worklife eat into your personal time. Stop caring what people think about you, but that’s not a license to be a dick. Make the world a better place for having you in it. If you need help, ask. Eat well, don’t smoke, drink in moderation and wear sunblock - these things will help your later life be more worthwhile.
I think at around age 50 theres some negative sentiment towards younger generations and that racket they keep making. Source: am 50
I truly hope this never becomes me.
I used to be with ‘it’, but then they changed what ‘it’ was. Now what I’m with isn’t ‘it’ anymore and what’s ‘it’ seems weird and scary. It’ll happen to you
Yes, there is more.
You sound like you are experiencing burnout and as a result anhedonia and depression.
Burnout is a very real clinical condition caused by the demands you are operating under being dysfunctional in some way. It is very real and can lead to a dangerous depression.
Anhedonia is the loss of enjoyment in things you previously enjoyed. For example, when I had anhedonia video games because uninteresting, boring even, and the effort required to play was too much and there was no reward to playing.
You need to deal with this before it escalates into full blown depression and burnout. It can take much longer to fix than it will take to stop now, so get started ASAP. Starting an antidepressant may be helpful, it may not, but it is just one tool and I personally would avoid it having done it before.
The other steps for managing burnout are largely about changing the demands on you, the level of connection to other people, and what you do to relax. Exercise is a really helpful tool and honestly is what makes me resilient against another bout of burnout now.
Good luck
This comment right here.
With burnout and depressive states your ability to foresee the good in life, or even experiences outside of the grind, is severely curtailed: you essentially develop emotional tunnel vision. A psychiatrist can help you break the negative spiral.
Every day I’m not working I feel tired constantly, regardless of amount of sleep.
It may be worth to check this with a doctor. What you describe may be sleep apnea. It is less common in young people but is better to check.
That, low Vitamin D levels (I suffered from exactly this due to being a shut-in + pandemic quarantine) or a bunch different things.
You definitely should not be waking up tired from just working. Get checked.
Also I am just thrilled that so many here have encouraged you to view your awareness of just how shitty the system is as a mental illness, as a failure on your part to be correctly integrated into society. There is nothing wrong with you. What is wrong is the system itself.
Make sure that you’re not depressed, this sounds like it. But it doesn’t have to be a mental thing.
Get your bloodwork done at a doctor (tell them you’re constantly tired / don’t have energy), that’s the first check. If that checks out then you might be getting enough sleep, but it’s shitty quality.
For example despite 8+ hours a night I was feeling like crap most of the day. Well, my nose closed in the night and I couldn’t breathe properly, which lead to awful sleep (I just had an operation for it, it has already gotten better but is still healing off). If you can breathe well through your nose, maybe do a sleep study to check if you actually get restful sleep.
If all of that checks out too, then you might have to do lifestyle changes. More fresh air, sun, workouts, eating better, but you know the drill already.
I’m also like you at times, and have been for a long time, but it does get better. One thing that’s a bit crappy though is if you’re in the US then vacation time is very limited (here in EU countries we don’t have that problem as much). But really first check your health, you might confuse something being wrong with your body with a mental problem.
Just sounds like Vitamin D deficit, or something else related to not getting proper rest from sleep. This is not typical of someone your age.
Funny enough, I’m only saying this because I hate how fast some general practitioners are at diagnosing it, so the irony isn’t lost on me. But you’re actually stating the issues, and not just saying “I’m a programmer/factory worker” which is all it takes with them and why I despise it.
Get a blood test done if you want to make sure. Don’t just listen to the internet.
That’s why we need to strive toward working less hours in general. Full time hours take up most of your waking hours when you factor in prep time, commute etc
What you do with your free time can make a world of difference of course but the math just doesn’t work out when you get home and have like 4 hours to do everything you need to do before you have to go to sleep.
Agree… The fact that many people here think that if you’re not happy woking, eating, sleeping then you’re probably ill, it kinda scares me tbh
You’re experiencing burnout. Rest up enough to improve your mental state, not finding joy in previous hobbies is a telltale sign. Try something that requires less critical focal or lets you take reprieve from your day to day schedule; vegging out, going for a walk, casual talk with friends, get counseling if you feel you need it, etc. The system will bleed everyone dry and leave them to rot if you let it. Take that time back and invest it in yourself.
“The system will bleed everyone dry and leave them to rot if you let it”
👆
This! Exactly this.
Our system is designed to explore the weakest. Once you get trapped on the rate wheel you are done.
It’s almost impossible for someone from a lower income family background to climb the “ladder”.
A few things can help :
- Live with less
- Do a job that you like
- Eat healthy
- Do exercise
- Get a Hobby
-
As others have said. If you feel like shit all day no matter how much you sleep then its most likely a diet issue. It’s crazy how normalized completely shit diets are. Its not going to be easy to fix. You’re going to have to do a lot of experimentation and research to see what works for you. I never really had a terrible diet and I felt okay most days. Never thought much of it but once I started to exercise more and looked into sports science on diets I realized how bad my diet actually was. After changing it and getting proper nutrition I was pretty shocked at how much better I felt. I was awake and alert all day and got great sleep. Definitely get a blood test or something. I also recommend doing some research on getting quality sleep. If you’re getting a lot of sleep but its shit quality then it doesnt mean a whole lot. Consistent sleep schedule, eating at the right times, and managing the light you take in during the day can make a huge difference.
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You might check out mealime. It’s got the same information, only you put in a meal plan and it creates a shopping list. So if 2 recipes call for a half a head of cabbage each it’ll have you buy a single cabbage.
Can it propose meal plans as well? If I don’t have to think about what to eat, I feel less anxious and usually eat better.
It has a bunch of recipes to choose from for free and the subscription is worth it, though I’d prefer they billed actually instead of $3/month.
Great, thanks for the info. I will check it out.
We found these too expensive and wasteful, for what you get, to continue using them. But we did keep some of the recipes and we still make them on our own.
If this helps someone get a jumpstart on home cooking, it’s well worth it. You can get the same from just trying more things from a cookbook but if the hassle of planning and shopping is a barrier to getting started, then by all means try one of these services and learn to cook.
We live in a sick society, so don’t let anyone tell you you’re the one who’s ill because the full time cycle of work-eat-sleep wears you down. You’d have to be sick to enjoy this system.
The system that requires you and I toil away day by day is temporary. One day (maybe not soon) we won’t have to work our lives away, either because we’ll need to survive or because the collective consciousness will finally realize that we’re living post-scarcity.
Either way, that’s what I look forward to and in the mean time I just do what I can to make sure I’m not completely miserable.
We were tricked into thinking being meat bots for the rich while they prance around the Disney land we create for them, is our purpose. And every miserable bastard will tell all the other miserable bastards to do the same shit because they are miserable bastards.
